I shouldn't be writing this. I should be doing about a million other things that life has for me to do right now. But I can't help it. I've come to realize the value of writing in this space. It helps relieve me of emotional weight. Simply by thinking through whatever it may be that is on my mind and throwing it out to the universe in this way, I feel better. I don't mean just when it's a challenging or negative issue I am dealing with but also when I have something good and great going on. I feel that much better by sharing it "out loud" with the universe. And as the title to this entry indicates, I am all about the flow right now and the flow is telling me I should be writing.
Actually, the flow lately has been what my life has been about. I've written very recently about this topic and how I've followed my flow for the last few years and have experienced life like never before. This has been different. The flow lately has been on one hand sporadic and on the other completely unbelievable in how it has carried me forward. The details don't matter but suffice it to say, the flow is taking me to new places as I write and I am trusting that and respecting that.
One thing I am beginning to realize about the flow is that I must respect it. First I have to acknowledge it, otherwise I can't do a thing with it of course, but then I absolutely HAVE to respect it. And I have to be thankful for it. I've found that by doing so, it tends to keep giving back to my life in ways I don't expect. I don't understand this yet but I do know it is key to my belief that everything in life - positive or negative - happens for a reason. The more I believe that and practice what I preach about the flow, the more the flow gives to me. It makes me wonder how I can give back to the flow. How do I give back to something that I can only best describe as a feeling? Something worth pondering. I will have to explore that further in the future.
On another note, I am a horrible yogi. Doug Swenson made me realize this to a degree. I sit there drinking a beer while he eats an organic salad sprayed with some sort of "amino dressing." For breakfast he has a fresh squeezed fruit and veggie drink of some sort while I have several cups of coffee. I have got so much friggin' work to do when it comes to my physical and spiritual yoga practice. But the thing I love about yoga is it keeps calling me back AND it keeps me thinking about positive progress AND the more I do it, the more I want that positive progress in my life. Problem lately has been I haven't been able to practice. More than 2 weeks now. Various reasons but primarily work or family related responsibilities trump yoga when things get crazy.
On even another note, someone asked me the other day if I will ever teach yoga. The interesting thing about that moment is that I did not hesitate in saying yes and in addition, I stated that was my goal. What is interesting about that is I have only ever shared this with Marcia in the past. But in this moment, I did not hesitate to share it with this person. I've thought about that quite a bit since it happened and I think now that means I have a clear new path that I have announced to the universe (yet again) and now have to figure out how the flow will get me there (or how I will flow in getting there). I have thought a lot about teaching but I have two primary concerns with this; a) my practice is not advanced at ALL (and I don't just mean my physical practice) and b) I want to feel like I have a very good if not complete understanding of the anatomy of yoga. Both of which will take time and a teacher training (or two). In any case, it's something to work towards.
On one last note but on the same chord as one of those previous notes, thank you. Thank you flow for showing your presence in my life and for leading me where I am meant to be lead. Thank you for everything that I have. Thank you for everything that I have yet to be given by you. I hope one day to be able to truly give back to you the way you give to me.